It’s that picture again
by James on Mar.10, 2010, under Random
But this time, with a story:
Darth Vader stood at the edge of large desert, the smoking ruin of his tie fighter sticking out of the dune behind him. He knew that he must cross the desert to get off of this miserable planet but he also knew that he lacked the provisions for such a trip.
Vader had nearly resigned himself to his fate when a great feline sped across the sands and came to a stop next to him.Seizing upon his luck, Vader asked the beast if it would bear him to the nearest spaceport.
The great feline sat back upon its haunches, gave the request a moments thought, and then shook its enormous head.
“The Dark Side and you are one,” it said, “Surely you would slay if given the chance.”
“Never would I do such a thing,” Vader replied, “for I were to slay you in the heat of the desert, I would surely die.”
The cat cocked its head and considered the logic,” All right, climb up on my back and together we shall ride.”
Grabbing onto its fur, Vader mounted the beast and soon they were naught but an orange blur racing across the sands.
Without warning, the great feline felt a tightening in its throat. Gasping for air it tripped and it fell, sliding into the base of an enormous sand dune. It fought and it sputtered but in the end its struggles were insignificant next to the power of the Force.
As the feline breathed its last, it managed to gasp, “But why? Now you will also surely die.”
Darth Vader merely shrugged his shoulders, “I’m a Dark Lord of the Sith, what did you expect?”
Yes, you’ve probably heard this one before, but it’s in the public domain. Take that Aesop!
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Must Post!
by James on Mar.10, 2010, under Personal
Must post, James Rummel’s gonna delete me! Must post, James Rummel’s gonna delete me! Must post, James Rummel’s gonna delete me! Must post, James Rummel’s gonna delete me! Must post, James Rummel’s gonna delete me! Must post, James Rummel’s gonna delete me! Must post, James Rummel’s gonna delete me! Must post, James Rummel’s gonna delete me!
But seriously, without an official notification from the author, one month, otherwise give them six.
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Woman crashes car while shaving privates
by James on Mar.07, 2010, under News
Megan Barnes was in a car accident. She rear ended a pickup truck. She did this apparently because she was shaving her “bikini area”. This story has all kinds of wrong.
- She was shaving because she was on her way to see her boyfriend
- Her ex-husband was in the car with her
- He was steering
- She was driving (sort of) on a suspended license
At least she wasn’t talking on her cell phone too.
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Bose says I should pay $99 to fix something I didn’t break
by James on Mar.06, 2010, under Rant, Technology
Recently, on Twitter, I responded to Anil Dash’s rather acerbic comment (which her promptly rescinded, no doubt under duress when when Apple’s stormtroopers kicked in his door) on how Apple periodically likes to make their products incompatible with everything else. I commented back about how my Bose Sound Dock will not charge my iPod Touch.
Thirty-four minutes later, I was contacted by Bose Service who stated that they had seen my tweet and wanted to help. I figured what the hell. I figured that they were maybe handing out adapters to fix the problem (either for free or a small charge) but no, after a little back and forth I found this out.
So here I am, stuck with a less functional sound dock with my only option being to spend $99 to “fix” it or just buy a new one. Ya, thanks but no thanks.
I would like to add a note that I don’t just a problem with Bose (though I am severely disappointed with their “in ear head phones” that only stay in when you sit perfectly still”) on this but also with Apple. It takes real disdain to hand out licenses to make third party accessories and then fuck them over like that.
In this case, Apple screws over the accessory maker who then screws over their existing customer base. Like they say, shit rolls down hill.
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It’s everybody else’s fault but mine!
by James on Mar.06, 2010, under News
This, this is so unbelievably stupid that it warrants the creation of its very own tag.
I’m sure we all remember back in ‘94 when a woman put hot coffee between her legs, spilled it, and burned her hoo ha. For her gross negligence she was (initially) awarded several million dollars.
That, to my vague and hazy recollections, is the day the lawsuit jackpot started. Soon everybody who did something stupid was suing the manufacturer, the seller, and their neighbor in an attempt to make a buck.
Inane warning signs proliferated like weeds. But no, that wasn’t enough, not for William Ogletree.
On December 30, 2009, the dawn of a new era began. Not simply content with finding ways to hurt himself doing idiotic things with mundane items, he is threatening a lawsuit because he forgot his coat and no one bother to have “…collected the coat, kept it in a secure place and held it for a reasonable period of time for the owner to locate it”.
That’s right, folks, he forgot his coat and its someone else’s fault that he didn’t get it back. Apparently the City of Houston, The Westfield Concession Management, Inc, and Continental Airlines are supposed to be his mommy.
Hat Tip: The Smoking Gun
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