Under a Gibbous Moon

Recently on tv, Miller has been running commercials for MGD 64. Its that low calorie beer that they accomplish by cutting their already watery beer with more water. So now they have a 64 calorie water. Screw you Crystal Light! Lousy 5 calorie delight. However the commercial does come with a significant rebuttal commercial opportunity.

The commercial has the setting of a well-lit bar with three guys standing around. Two with MGD 64 and one with Michelob Ultra. The guy with the Michelob is doing squat-thrusts while holding his beer in an attempt to burn off the excess calories it has. His friends shame him in front of the hot bar maid. Lesson(I guess):Drink low calorie beer and you won’t have to exercise and look stupid in front of the hot bar maid.

Here’s where Michelob uses this. They play the exact same commercial except the guy exercising says, “I would rather do squat-thrusts in the bar than drink MGD 64.” Then fade to logo or slogan or something.

The media always has it’s trends on what kind of news stories it likes to report. At least this is what I assume happens since I don’t think that particular crimes just happen in spurts around our country. “I think this week all the criminals will rob banks. Next week, it will be kidnapping.” They figure out what is popular based on readership, or hits for online sources, and find and report on that topic for a while. Recently we seem to have famous people raping or molesting the regular people. I previously discussed LT’s little predicament, so I’ll leave that out.

Ahh...Just what the media ordered!

We have had now Steelers QB Ben Roethlisberger and actor Steven Seagal. I don’t want to discuss a lot of detail about the particular cases, but they both lack credibility. How is that? Well outside of some circumstances that don’t seem to fit, they have both refused to file criminal charges and have jumped into civil lawsuits. Nothing says gold-digging whore like accusing someone of a crime, refusing to file criminal charges, but freely jumping into the “gimme money” phase.

Is this proof of guilt or innocence? Absolutely not. But in an era where our court cases are won or lost in the media, this looks bad. Sadly, from reading internet comments (where the stupid comes out to play) some seem to think that a womans accusations of sexual misconduct against a man automatically makes him guilty. Sadly a premise all too frequently shared by our legal system. That and having a prior unfounded accusation makes the accusations true for then and now.

Well you heard him. You are now all left in my capable hands. And as your newly appointed benevolent despot, let me assure you that this power won’t go to my head. Just remember that I have absolute rule. Final say-so in everything. I am god-like in stature and ability. I AM YOUR GOD! KNEEL BEFORE ME! ME! ME! I HOLD THE KEYS TO THE KINGDOM! BE BEHOLDEN TO MY GRACE OR I WILL SMITE THEE!

I recently recieved a letter in the mail from my old cable and internet service provider.The reason we got rid of them was they were radically overpriced and provided extremely poor service. Apparently, their service was so poor that it was illegal. The letter was notifying us about a class action settlement involving RCN’s habit of throttling people who had the nerve of making use of their broadband connection.

RCN’s poor service aside, that is not the real travesty. According to the letter, the lawyers stand to collect $540,00. So how much does the plaintiff get? A one time payment of $3,000. Yup that’s it. Despite it’s class action status, no one else gets anything and the person who originally brought suit will get about 5.5% of what their lawyers do. What a country we live in.

One thing that always infuriates me, is how many people believe whatever comes out of a political pundits mouth, no matter how outrageous or idiotic. Of course, psychologists would say that people are just looking for someone with authority to confirm their own views.

Personally, I’d rather look at it from a far more logical perspective. All these people make lots and lots of money. The louder they yell and the more shit they shovel, the more people tune in. The simple fact is, the more outrageous the lie, the more they profit and this provides a strong incentive for them to lie and fan flames.

The only way to return any kind of sanity to the political spectacle is, counter-intuitively,  stop paying attention to them. I’m not saying ignore politics but just change the channel and turn the dial when the blow hards come on, eventually they’ll just go away.