Under a Gibbous Moon

We’ve all seen those stupid personal questions that banks, in particular, tack onto your log in so that someone who knows what high school you went to can bypass knowing your password.

Ally Bank has taken this to a higher level with personal questions when you call in. You can create your own question/answer pair and the operator presents the challenge and you must answer it. Of course, this leads to all kinds of fun:

Q: Do you know why I think you’re so sexy?
A: Probably because you’re totally in love with me.Q: Need any weed? Grass? Kind bud? Shrooms?
A: No thanks hippie, I’d just like to do some banking.

Q: The Penis shoots Seeds, and makes new Life to poison the Earth with a plague of men.
A: Go forth, and kill. Zardoz has spoken.

Q: What the hell is your fucking problem, sir?
A: This is completely inappropriate and I’d like to speak to your supervisor.

Q: I’ve been embezzling hundreds of thousands of dollars from my employer, and I don’t care who knows it.
A: It’s a good thing they’re recording this call, because I’m going to have to report you.

Q: Are you really who you say you are?
A: No, I am a Russian identity thief.

Of course, you can always come up with your own:

Q: What is the airspeed of an unladen swallow?
A: African or European?

Q: What do you do with a drunken sailor?
A: Throw him in the bunk with the captain’s daughter.

Q: Sir, did you know that the possibility of successfully navigating an asteroid field is approximately 3,720 to 1?
A: Never tell me the odds.

Q: You load sixteen tons and what do you get?
A: Another day older and deeper in debt.

Q: What manner of man are you that can summon up fire without flint or tinder?
A: I am an enchanter.

Q: By what name are you known?
A: There are some who call me… Tim.

I imagine that any profane questions would be rejected but it’s always humorous to see a company that hasn’t quite thought things through.

Hat Tip: Schneier on Security

Related (maybe) posts:

1. There is no such thing as a stupid question
2. A question of OpSec
3. Stay put in a home invasion
4. An opened letter
5. The dangers of fanboyism